Planning a wedding can be really stressful because it is that extraordinary occasion in your life, which you don’t want to take any chances with. It is not a simple task to ensure that your marriage day will pass on smoothly without any untoward incident happening. A marriage has its own exclusive set of issues, and thorough preparation and perfect implementation is necessary to make sure that these issues don’t cause havoc on the wedding day.

The first thing that you need to look into before planning for a wedding is the budget. Despite marriages being extravagant occasions, one can notably cut down on the costs by being a little original. For example, a creatively inclined relative can take up some of the decoration of the wedding hall, including flower arrangements. The task is not that difficult to execute and if done in-house can be inexpensive, considering you are not engaging an outsider to do it. Moreover, flowers normally cost a princely sum in the market, and mixing a bunch of wild flowers in the bouquets would be good for your budget.

The venue is probably the most important aspect of a wedding. You must put in significant effort in ensuring that you are picking the correct venue. Everything, from the floor area of the venue to its location and the amenities it offers, is important to ensure that the correct venue has been chosen for the event.

Photography is another thing that you need to be careful about while planning a wedding. You would want your photographs to capture the true spirit of your marriage so that they always bring back the same thrilling and euphoric sentiments whenever you see them.

While selecting a cameraman, be sure that his style matches with what you are looking for. If you are based in Singapore, then this should not be very difficult. A good Singapore wedding photographer can be found through a quick search on ‘photographer wedding’ using any search engine tailored for Singapore results. In addition, the rates offered for wedding photography services on the internet will be more lucrative than what you will get elsewhere.

It seems unlikely that anyone could improve his or her marriage in one evening. Well read on! Any positive step in the right direction is an improvement that will continue as long as the efforts continue to be made.

As our recent MarriageAdvice.com poll showed, more than 40% of our 207 respondents identified that the single biggest frustration in their marriage was that their husbands “Didn’t Communicate Enough”.

Below is a 8-step process to insure that both partners are communicating well.

Step #1 – Decide To Communicate

There are really only two options when it comes to communicating…either you do it or your don’t. It’s better to try and communicate and fumble around a bit than ignore the problem until it explodes like a pent up volcano.

The wise spouse will work to resolve and discuss their feelings before the lava of scalding words overflows.

Part of deciding to communicate will include setting aside a time each week to discuss family needs and concerns. This would also be a good time to resolve any minor conflicts that have arisen during the week but weren’t fully taken care of previously.

Step #2 – Choose A Good Time

If a more heated conflict occurs, it’s important to find the right time to discuss the matter. Waiting for your scheduled night for communicating would not be the best idea; however, taking a little time to give both partners time to cool off is important as well.

Working to resolve a big conflict should wait until a time when both parties are not wrung out, angry, tire, or hungry. Your physical state directly impacts your mental state and your ability to work through problems in a rational manner.

Additionally, as we allow ourselves time to calm down, we are better able to carefully think about what is really bothering us besides this specific event. In many cases, the topic of the current disagreement may not be the real problem.

As we take time to ponder and look for the root of the problem, we are better able to expand our vision to the whole picture and not just have tunnel vision of the current problem at hand. Keep in mind, it may just be we’ve had a bad day and this problem was the last straw.

It’s much easier to resolve a problem when we have a better perspective of what is really going on inside of our head and heart.

Step #3 – Neutralize Defenses

Before you have a deep discussion on something that is bothering you, consider two things. First, your spouse will be more receptive to the discussion if you reinforce your love, and express appreciation and confidence in their many attributes.

Second, you choose if you will be irritated or angry, so you need to express yourself in a away that acknowledges your responsibility for your feelings. “You make me so mad!” Really is a false statement because you have allowed yourself to become mad.

However,if you said, “When you make fun of me in front of our friends, it embarrasses me and I feel angry and frustrated,” you would be giving a very accurate statement about what has happened to you. Invite your spouse to help you solve this problem you are having, then they become part of the solution, not the problem.

Step #4 – Use Humor

Like they say, “laughter is the best medicine”. It’s true, physiologically, it relieves stress, and mentally it gives you a time out to relax. You will find that the longer you have been married, the more you have to laugh about.

Many things that were painful or frustrating at the time can be viewed with great humor years later.

Creating code words from some of these humorous events will help relieve tensions when a similar event threatens to evolve.

When either my husband or I say something that is insensitive to the work effort done by the other, all we have to say is “I hate kidney beans”, and the other one immediately realizes their actions are bordering on being insensitive.

It’s an easy way to control tense situations, prevent them from escalating and elicit a sincere, “I’m Sorry.”

A word of caution, be sensitive to the situation. There are times when humor is neither appropriate or too late in coming and will be viewed as sarcasm. Sarcasm has no place in true efforts to communicate.

Step #5 – Be Fair

Be careful when discussing sensitive issues and don’t fall into touchy subjects that you know will enflame the argument.

Looking for fair solutions may require compromising or acquiescing. Remember, you both need to give, sometimes a little, sometimes a lot, to resolve conflicts.

Step #6 – Finding a Peaceful Stalemate

There are times when you need to just agree to disagree. You don’t always have to agree 100% with your spouse, so there are occasions when a peaceful stalemate would be appropriate. It is only a legitimate solution as long as it isn’t just putting off the blow up for another time.

A peaceful stalemate results in open discussion about your differences, why neither of you feel you can change at this time, and acceptance of each others differences.

Step #7 – Willingness to Change

When we truly feel loved, it gives us the freedom to risk changing and growing into a new and improved version of our old self.

As we nurture our marriage relationship, the love and acceptance we feel will be liberating as we make minor and sometimes major changes in whom we are.

Marriage is a wonderful opportunity to practice charity towards our spouse and provide a safe relationship where growth can occur.

Step #8 – Bolster Each Other

No matter what solution you have arrived at, it’s important to always express love and confidence in each other after a disagreement. As we show this love in days to come, it will be clear that no one is harboring ill feelings about the disagreement and that it was truly resolved.

When both partners feel loved and supported in their relationship after a disagreement, it’s easier to resolve future problems with love and respect.

By applying these communication steps, you have now discovered how you can change your marriage in one evening. It will take practice, but with time, you will discover that your marriage has improved more than ten-fold.

About the Author
Beth Young is the Senior Editor of the leading marriage advise web site, MarriageAdvise.com. To download your free ebook titled, “101 Marriage Secrets” visit http://www.MarrigeAdvice.com.

Article source:
How I Improved My Marriage Ten-Fold In One Evening

You’ve heard the “4 Cs” of smart diamond buying. But what about the wedding band? Wedding bands are not the most expensive wedding purchase you will make, not like spending between $1,000-$10,000 on that beautiful sparkling diamond rock. You may not spend a lot of time researching the wedding band purchase, but many people end up wearing their wedding band more often and on a day to day basis compared to their engagement ring.

Make an informed decision when purchasing your wedding band.

�Do you prefer a traditional plain wedding band or a design wedding band?

�Do you want to budget in for a designer name brand or do you prefer to forgo the brand name and opt out for essentially the same ring without the “name”, thereby significantly reducing costs?

�Pricing Your Wedding Band.

Plain Wedding Bands

You may want to consider a plain band if you prefer a simple design or are not a big “jewelry person”. As a jeweler, I often get women shopping for their husbands wedding bands who are considering a plain band because their husband “does not like jewelry”. I usually recommend a narrower plain wedding band, such as a white gold or yellow gold 4mm wide band. Although a wider 6mm, 7mm, or 8mm band is standard for most men, someone who does not wear a lot of jewelry may feel more comfortable in a narrow band. (Wedding bands are usually measured in millimeters. A 4mm band is approx. �” wide).

If someone is looking for something with a little more of a design, but still wants a simpler band, I may even steer them towards a more subtle design, such as a hammered wedding band. Hammered bands are still understated, but a little more exciting than a traditional plain band.

Design Band

There are many types of design wedding bands to choose from, such as braided wedding bands, hammered design bands, paisley bands, and other unique designs, such as a Celtic wedding band.

The type of design band wedding you choose is a personal choice. There is nothing scientific or practical in selecting a design wedding band other than primarily deciding what type of design you simply like.

The only practical considerations that you may want to make in selecting a wedding band with designs is in understanding that trends come and go and you will be wearing and looking at the design hopefully forever. The other consideration is in deciding whether you will wear your ring on a daily basis and what kind of wear and tear your ring can safely sustain. This usually depends on the type of work or career or regular hobbies.

Do you work with your hands a lot? Do you do construction work or do you have an office job that is not taxing on your hands? In purchasing a design band, if you are planning to wear your ring to a job that is physically demanding you may want to consider a hammered design band or a similarly rugged design that can withstand wear and tear. You may want to stay away from a braided wedding band, for example, if you are a police officer and want to wear your ring on the job! If you are “outdoorsy” and rugged, you may want a more solid band with less design that could get damaged.

Keep in mind these are extreme cases. Most braided wedding bands are tougher than they appear and will be fine under most conditions.

Design Band or Designer Name Brand

Most wedding bands that are on the market today are actually not designer name brand rings, yet they are, in my opinion, the same quality as most designer name brand rings. The difference with a designer name brand and a generic version is mainly the price. Most design bands range between $300-$350 vs. $600-$800 for the exact ring made by a known designer name.

However, if paying 2-3 times more is not a significant difference to you, you may want to consider a name brand simply for the security or status that the name you purchase may give you. In shopping for a wedding band, whether it is a designer name or not, make sure you understand your wedding or jewelry store’s policies, warranties, and guarantees. Often, the generic brand will offer you the same security, quality, and warranties. So why spend the extra?

Yellow Gold, White Gold, or Two-Tone

This too is mostly a personal choice, but there are a few things to consider in selecting your wedding bands’ color or metal type.

White gold is often more suitable for those who are not normally big jewelry wearers. White gold is also somewhat more contemporary, although trends suggest that yellow gold may be coming back strong into fashion. Ultimately, whether you choose yellow or white gold should depend on your personal preference, rather than following any trend, since trends come and go and you plan to wear your ring forever!

You may also want to consider two-tone gold. Two-tone wedding rings are an excellent compromise between subtle and rich tones and they serve one additional purpose that people tend to overlook.

Two-tone wedding bands give you the flexibility of both yellow and white gold colors so that you can match a variety of other jewelry with your wedding jewelry. If you buy a white gold wedding band, all of your future jewelry purchases will tend to be white gold. Wearing yellow gold or two-tone with your white gold ring may clash. The same can be said of pure yellow gold. But with a two-tone wedding band, you can wear an all yellow gold bracelet or watch, for example, and interchange jewelry and colors. This adds great versatility to your jewelry line-up.

Price Benchmarks

Use the below benchmarks to assess if your selected jeweler is charging you too much or if their prices are reasonable.

Expect to spend between $100-$150 for a plain, traditional wedding band.

Expect to spend approx. $300 for a standard, but high quality design wedding band.

Expect to spend between $600-$800 for a designer name brand.

Remember, you may not want to dish out the additional cost for a designer name brand when you can find virtually the same ring without the “name”. Above all, this should be a choice that you make yourself or with your spouse. Forget about trends and think long-term. $300 over 50 years of your life is less than a penny a day! Don’t get caught up too much in the price. Opt for the ring that you really want. You plan to wear your ring forever.

About the Author
Afshin Yaghtin graduated from UCLA as an English major and earned his M.A. degree in Literature at the University of Wales. He is currently the owner of Apples of Gold Jewelry and Wedding-Band-Ring.Com.

Article source:
How to Choose the Right Wedding Band